Before we get into it, just gonna inject some quick sports real quick. CJ McCollum. So we recently did a skit where we smashed up a jeep. Um, you should know where to find it. It was pretty cool and all, and we ended up still getting $250 for the Jeep! Possibly more than we would have pre-smash! It was difficult staying 6 feet apart, but we pretty much did 4 realz.Noah stole the show, as usual and everyone implied that he ended up getting the job as assistant bowladrome manager. He was dressed for the job he wanted! You should too! And there was this quick lil curious cat chillin the whole time! He was too sneaky to get more footage, sad! Listen to this song as many times as you need to.
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So yea, I was surfin the net for a while this evening. Also happened to participate in some group chat activity so, I imagine it would have looked like AJ Soprano to most people, but I did manage to uncover some hidden gems on the net. Namely, if you want to waste some money because you're so rich you don't even know the value of stuff any more and just click around, check out this sick boat! It's a model, but still! Ok, whatever. You're not into boats. Or models. Huh? Oh, yea model boats. Whatever. Well, bust out your credit card and be a real man!! Thing is only 20 grand! That's a bargain! Bro. Lol. If you're still reading, you probably haven't bought either one, but are holding out for the price to go down. Good for you. You should look into a career as a financial advisor! Serious! Those guys have no idea! You would kill it!
So, I know I'm late to the game, but they always say you should invest in what you use, so I guess now I'm advocating to buy snapchat stock. It's not like I even really know what I'm doing on this app, but I have learned recently that it can be fun. If you play around with the features, you can add all kinds of different wacky layers to a picture. Ok, maybe there are millions of apps like that, but since my friends started doing it on snapchat (ticker: SNAP), I decided I would join in the cool fun. For example, here is a picture of what I would look like if I were a freelance, pirate-themed magician. Pretty cool! Now, here's one of my friend looking like a beautiful woman: Beauty is in the eye of the beholder! I guarantee someone out there has a fetish for this exact kind of thing. I'm sure you guys are all wondering and hoping that I'll post myself as a beautiful woman. Nope. Only shaming my friends today. Actually, now I feel kinda bad. So here's a pic of same buddy Phil looking cool! So, yea, that's pretty much everything on my mind for today. Looked at some other blogs online and it looks like you guys want more multimedia and less words. So, that's what I'm doing. And I promise I'm gonna try to try being more consistent with these, since I know there are tons of people that can benefit from this content! And occasionally, gonna throw in one of my favorite tunes. Can't go wrong with Nas, yo. I remember about a year ago, on the eve of the new NFL season, Drew Brees was making some very similar comments about the national anthem as he's made recently and no one really said anything about. Well, I don't always check the crazy parts of the internet on Reddit and Twitter and whatnot but basically what the f! Last year it was nothing nothing to talk about and now you know it's crazy everybody's really noticing like holy shit! When there are guys like that coming out like saying the complete wrong thing should be chastised roundly and it's starting to happen which is refreshing to say the least.
For this guy, apparently, the time to take off your shirt is pretty much whenever you feel like it. Funny thing is, its usually easy to hate a cool guy trying to be cool by making a spectacle of himself, but I actually like this guy. At least I like the version of him my imagination creates to go along with this photograph. I believe this picture was taken by myself at the Tavern in the Square in Allston (TITS). That is about all I can remember about it.
First off, let's analyze his torso area. Dudes, in pretty good shape, so did he plan to take off his shirt at some point like some devious mastermind? Possible, but that would be one evil bastard, more likely hell bent on world domination to do something like that. So for now, let's cross that off the list. Next, let's take a look at the leg area. I believe those may be jean shorts (JORTS). Not 100% sure but let's go with that. I think combined with the fact that he's got a beard and seemingly a recent haircut, that this is just one of those fun-loving, ironic guys. I mean, we're in Allston, right? Lot of silly fucks down there. And he's got what appear to be some old school white tennis shoes. I bet they're KEDS, no one ever has those anymore. So cool. Finally, I want to address what makes everything else stated before totally irrelevant. Check out his arms and face! He is smiling a huge smile and gyrating them shits to let everybody know he is not only the joke, but IN on the joke! What a guy! You think I'm kidding but Im actually dead ass serious. Next round is on me, guy! If I every see you and somehow magically recognize that you are also this guy! So, yea, when is it ok to take off your shirt. Well, I guess we're still learning. But this is one instance in which it is A-OK! Thank you! When sports goes away we need to find something to do. I still watch TV. I pretty much do all the things I usually do, which is not much! But I actually was thinking recently that maybe I don't need to watch every single minute of every Celtics game? Maybe I could just watch the highlights and that will be fun. Maybe I could just watch the extended highlights on this guy's sweet channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCsvPqANw09HyK7jsXUC3kuA. Actually, it's a good place to get a taste of some Celtics Green while the season is on hiatus.
The latest news is that the owners are hopeful about coming back, but it may not be until winter, pretty much. So, what do you do? Just watch silly youtube videos about people doing make believe sports at their house? Bo-ring. Watch all the decent movies on Netflix? Already done. I will tell you what you do. You work on your game. You practice your ups. You lower your bball hoop until you can dunk on it, and then raise it incrementally so you think there may be a time at which you can actually dunk on a real hoop. You don't watch the old games they put on TV that you don't remember because you were too drunk. You don't start watching golf and other trash sports. You do. Just do it. Like this guy: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k5kgR5dcEHQ. If you don't have a hoop, you go on craigslist and pick one up. No pickup truck? Get one with wheels and wheel it back to your place. Nothing can stop you. Except the cops. Here's a picture of me, a cool, college guy circa 2007. Wow, it's already been more than ten years! Really?! No! Ahh, wait, yep, yep I guess it has! Sucks. But the best thing I can do now that Im getting up there in age is to try and share my wisdom with the next gen (generation, if you shorten words and use em all the time like you know people are already gonna know what you're talking about, you're already pretty coo).
So yea, for all you incoming college students (if there ever is college anymore) here's a few bits of advice for 2020 non pandemic times: 1. Get a few small bottles of semi fancy liquor and keep 'em in your bedroom. You never know when an impromptu dance party or chilling might devolve into a "have a few drinks and be impressed with the guy who has the supply". You can see here that we also had a nice little barrel shaped liquor cabinet too. Thing is legendary but that's a story for another time. 2. Always have a facial expression like you're totally unimpressed. Pretty self explanatory, but if you're doing this, people might think you normally do incredible and wild things all the time so nothing fazes you anymore. 3. Stuff on the Walls: Scarface poster is a must. Then tone it down with some more obscure posters, preferably referencing stuff from back in the day so people can be impressed that you were alive in the 80s (well, 90s I guess for you guys). 4. Piss in the shower. Just do it. Who cares! 5. Definitely go to some of the classes. Technically, that's what you're paying for. Good luck to all, and may you all make Dean's list for one semester before falling back into academic probation! And go Minutemen! There's not much action on the streets in "these times" we are in. But that has to mean there is a lot happening (off the streets? Off-grid? Behind the scenes? [there are many cool ways to say whats good in the back of the shack, so to speak]). There's always something happening. Animals obviously don't give the first shit about any pandemic, they don't even know about it! Maybe dolphins do. So yea, but yea fuckin, you guys are out there doing your cool little projects out there and so are we here at BHP! Wed' love to see what y'all are working on so drop us a line! And buy a shirt! Got shirts for sale, bro!
The draft this year took place in unprecedented manner, as we all well know. We had to watch Roger Goodell in his basement trying to be friends with some preselected fans over video chat. Great, thanks. Who won, who lost? Yes. Who won? The Patriots. Why, you say? Because...because....they always win. No pro bowlers drafted in six years you say? Forget it. They're doing that on purpose so they don't have to pay extra bonuses, smart!
Who else is smart? Well, most of the guys running the show in NFL front offices are smart, I guess. But not all the guys from the Belichick learning "tree" turn out great (See: O'Brien, Bill). But Brian Flores in Miami is secretly working on the mystical "Foxborough 2.0" that so many other franchises have sought without success. Dude not only made work of the draft and the free agency compensatory pick system with more expertise than any of the other Belichick disciples within year one of hooking up with the new franch but he nabbed Matt Breida in an under-the-radar steal that would make ole' Bill tear up a lil' bit. The dolphs have always given the Pats fits as any casual fan might possibly know, but watch out! The dolphs are a force. (As soon as they demote Fitzpatrick to the bench). So, everything is shut down now. This year we expected big things from Box House Productions. Everyone did. But a lot of businesses and fake businesses are struggling right now. Thankfully, when times were better we were able to spring for the several year plan from Weebly for site hosting. But our record keeping department hasn't told us when that will actually expire, so we're hoping at least a few more years. Considering the fact that we didn't even ask the record keeping department and that such a thing does not exist here at BHP, very little of any of that is surprising. What should surprise you is that BHP is still hard at work trying to bring you some jokes. Or what we believe to be jokes. Stay safe, people and keeping laughin'.
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Nate's NotesThe ole' slow, rapid descent into madness. Archives
April 2021
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